Say No

 

 

 

Today, our Bishop came to talk to us during staff meeting. He came to listen and to give a few words of advice while we are in a time of transition with Pastor Joe resignation in the works. His last day is 5 weeks away. During the conversation, time management came up and he emphasized that during this time (especially) that we may (will) need to say NO.

By saying no, we will be able to protect ourselves and our spiritual and physical health is vital. It is great to hear that from leaders. Also, by saying NO, we are able to be more intentional with the “yes” that we give out and there are a few great yes’s that we need to do and commit to.

Then later today, I was flipping through pages on the internet and came across another “affirming” article that Andy Stanley had done on “the thin line”. The article was called THE TENSION OF NO. One of the great lines (highlighted) from the article is the following:

As you narrow your focus, you create more opportunity for other people.

I think this is golden and obviously is a great lead into “priesthood of all believers”. However, many in leadership are afraid to give ministry away. Many of us are terrible at saying NO, so we say YES to everything. When we say YES to everything, we are robbing individuals from doing ministry and serving out of their passion and that is a shame. But, at times, we go, it is so much easier if I did everything.

But, we can not do everything. We need to take a look at the bible and see that when the apostles/disciples could not do everything; they handed the ministry reigns over and devoted themselves to prayer and the ministry of the WORD.

Thoughts To Ponder

– what would happen if leaders were devote solely to prayer/word

– what is the toughest part of saying no

– are you willing to delegate the things that you should not be doing

 

Build or Fight

A few weeks ago, I had a discussion on facebook and in that discussion Nehemiah was mentioned. I disagreed with his premise but I loved the fact that he brought Nehemiah up. Nehemiah is a great book and I think that it has great insight on leadership.

Today, in some of my daily reading, I came across a blog post that used Nehemiah as an illustration and I want to share it with you. Here it is:

 

Nehemiah and the people took an unusual approach:

“Those who carried materials did their work with one hand and held a weapon in the other . . . ” (Nehemiah 4:17).

This image resonates with me. Nehemiah’s workforce couldn’t afford to simply fight enemies all day or the much-needed wall would simply never be built. Additionally, they couldn’t just go build the wall and ignore their enemies, lest they be attacked and destroyed while they are slinging brick and mortar. It’s a great word picture of building while facing a culture that wants to tear down what is being built.

So it is with our efforts to raise a child. If we spend all of our days fighting the enemies that threaten our family in today’s culture our kids won’t have the learned ability to make wise choices, turn from temptation, or minister in the dark corners of our culture. On the other hand, if we ignore all that threatens the faith and integrity of our families, we’ll find our kids continually damaged by what emerges from culture.

So, when you ask “What should I do? Fight or build?” The answer is: “Yes.” Think about your innate tendencies and then make sure you do both.

I think that this article is so vital for us as parents and as ministers to students. We have a tenancy to protect. The one thing that we sometimes forget to do is to equip. I know that as a minister that we (in the past, especially) have leaned toward protecting, warning and sometimes waging war on issues/thoughts. Instead of fighting and protecting – we should be encouraging and equipping.

As a dad of three kids, two that are now in junior high, I am becoming more and more aware of this as their “minister” but also as their dad. I am wanting my sons and daughter to be prepared for the world that they are going to be stepping into and I know that if I am constantly in the protect mode that when they step out the doors of our home; they will get devoured and that is a scary thought.

This goes back to the whole premise of Sticky Faith, Late Adolescence and more. These are some of the reasons that  people are walking away from their faith and church.

If you are wanting to read Billy Phenix full article which is worth the read, please click on the following link: Of Weapons And Tools.

Late Adolescence

Over the last year (especially), there has been a lot of buzz and talk about this topic. There are many conversations going on about individuals who are in the 18-25 age range. There are books, articles, seminars and more to help us understand the different dynamics that are occurring.

Adam McClane has been writing about this age segment for awhile. There is the new Sticky Faith book, study, dvd curriculum that is out to help us in this area. ReThink has put new resources and emphasis into the college life aspect as they have developed a thorough strategy around Orange and how this can be played out through college years as well.

So, yesterday, I received an email article that re-emphasized the importance of this ministry and also what it means.

We all know something is different with the college-age stage of life today. And this should not be a surprise. To some degree every generation looks back at the one following and recognizes differences. But articulating some of those differences can be a different story.

So, let me briefly point out a few differences between the college-age stage of life today from when you were likely that age:

• Graduating high school is now the rite of passage to begin figuring out a life direction versus a rite of passage into adulthood. It’s simply the next educational stage of life.
• There is now no clear rite of passage to becoming an adult. The line is blurred.
• Obtaining a bachelor degree is no longer a leg up. A bachelor degree is what a high school diploma used to be and it guarantee’s nothing. Only 25 percent of college graduates have a full-time job when they graduate and many obtain a job because they accept one outside their field of study.
• From the perspective of someone in this stage of life, the stage is less about preparing for potential future responsibilities as much as it is about discovering self. Future responsibilities are just that—future responsibilities.
• A master’s degree is what a bachelor degree used to be. But now, if one is obtained without appropriate work experience one will be over qualified. However, the economy is forcing some to further education without the work experience, leaving people in a unique tension point.
• The median age of marriage is now after this stage of life in the United States—25 for woman and 27 for men—and continues to rise.

I have been in youth ministry for almost 20 years and even though the shift slowly began back then, it is HUGELY different. I also know that as my boys have entered their junior high years that the landscape will change even more.

These are some thoughts for us to be thinking about for our children, us as parents and definitely for us in the ministry and how we can minister to the families during this time.